The Story Of A New Life

Last time, I shared about my life for the past 8 years. As much as possible, I really want to tell and share everything to each one of you, but it’s too long. Well, let’s make it short.

My Mom gave birth to my little brother, and after a year my grandmom died ‘coz of some complications in her tummy. It was the most heart breaking part of my life, knowing that I grew up with my grandmom. What makes it even harder, it was the fact that I was not there on her last moments, I was studying college in Manila at that time. After I heard that she passed away, I flew back as fast as I could. It was the most devastating part of our lives, especially for my Mom. I know how hard it was for her, to be honest my Mom and grandma don’t have a better relationship, but they love each other. I could tell that my Mom was not ok. A week after the burial, I went back to Manila to finish the last semester of my studies. It was hard actually, I had no one to talk to ‘coz my Dad was not in the Philippines at that time, I only live with my stepmom. Time passed by, me and my Mom learned how to live our lives without our dearest grandma. We know that she’s happy now.

I graduated college last 2015 and I started teaching in a private elementary school in the Philippines. Every year we celebrate grandma’s death anniversary, and I couldn’t help myself to cry, wishing she was still alive, so she could see all my hardworks, that I’m already a teacher.

The kind of life that I have right now, is the fruit of all my hardships in life, if it weren’t because of those trials, I would not be here. I owe it all to my Mom and grandma, because of them I became independent and strong. When I started teaching, my point of view in life changed. I visited one of the public schools in our country, and I saw their situation their. I saw the smile on their faces, they were very eager to learn despite of poverty. And at that time, they became my inspiration to stay strong and do more. For them, education is the key to success, and if it weren’t because of that eagerness to learn, I will not be a teacher. Let’s be more patient.

Love Edz! 😍😊

Sun Shines After A Storm

Last September 21, 2018, I started telling my childhood stories, on how my life was, since my Mom and Dad separated. I wasn’t able to finish the story because I was not feeling well that time. So, tonight I already have the gutz to share a lot to every one of you. Happy reading! 😊

So, as what I have said last time, my Mom went to Manila to work, she found a good job and supported us. She gave everything that she could to us and I appreciate all her efforts. I never changed actually, I learned how to value all the money that she has given to us, well that’s the least that I could do for my Mom. I was in 1st year college back then when my Mom got fired from her work, she said the company got bankrupt so they had to terminate some of their workers, and unfortunately she was one of those. She had no choice but to go home to our province, somehow I felt happy, ‘coz I’ll be with my Mom again. It was my 2nd semester in College when my Mom said she was pregnant (my youngest brother), at first, it didn’t sink in my mind, I was so sad and at the same time, I was so angry. Angry in the sense that how could she find a work again if she’ll be pregnant? Maybe for other people, it was not a big deal, but for me it was, at that time a lot of things happened, my grandmom was diagnosed with a liver cancer and she needed to get some medications, and I was still studying in college so we have to pay for my tuition, everything was a mess, and it so happened that my Mom got pregnant, so who will help us? I was so selfish at that time, I never thought of how my Mom would feel, I know, I blurted bad words against my Mom, we had a fight, that results to no conversations for about 3 months or more. I didn’t go home, I only stayed at my dormitory. It hurts a lot, I don’t want her to get pregnant, ‘coz we don’t have the enough money to support all our expenses. We didn’t talk. She tried to call me, but I never answered all her calls. I even turned off my phone so she can’t contact me anymore. And one day, I was watching television, it’s a documentary about homeless kids and families in the Philippines, I saw this kid, crying and she said “Love your parents, you’re lucky enough to have your parents with you, especially your Mom, I wish I still have my Mom with me”. (The kid has no mother at all, she was the one who takes care of her siblings). Somehow it made me cry, and it took me a week to realized that I was still lucky ‘coz I still have my Mom. I went home and said sorry to my Mom. She hugged me and cried. She explained to me not to get angry accept my brother, that I don’t have to get angry at him ‘coz it’s not his fault. It was really hard for me, but little by little, I came to a decision that in order for me to be happy, I have to forgive all the people that I hate. I have to be more appreciative and not to be selfish. God gives us problems, not to punish us but to make us even stronger. My Mom gave birth to my brother (Anthon), to make the long story short, my grandmom died last 2013 because of some complications in her liver. I know she’s happy now in the kingdom of God. Our life is unpredictable, we don’t know when the storm will come, but we have to learn how to survive and handle it. In every decision we make, we could change someones life. No matter how we plan our life, God’s plan is still the best.

I am your creator, you were in my care even before you were born” ISAIAH 44:2A (CEV)

Thank you!

Is Having A Broken Family really a curse?

My Mom and Dad separated when I was 3 years old. They left me to my grandmom and sent me to one of the provinces in the Philippines. To be honest no one in my family explained what was going on. As I turned 6 I was wondering why I don’t see my Dad. My relatives they once said that “I don’t have a Dad anymore”, but I just smiled, maybe because they were just teasing me, like what they always do. Until I saw my Mom with another man, currently my stepdad. I never asked my grandmom actually, maybe because at that time I already knew that all what I heard from my relatives were true. Years passed by and I had a baby brother (my half brother Vince Terry), I was in grade 1 that time. My Mom and stepdad rented a small house. My Mom took me from my grandmom’s house and said I’ll live with them. I think I lived with them for more than a year. I didn’t had a good relationship with my stepdad, maybe because I don’t like having a stepdad that time. I tried not to be that bad girl, I respected him ‘coz I don’t have a choice anyway, but there was an incident that happened that changed our lives. I was in grade 6 that time, my classmates at school were all complete, they have all have perfect families and I envied them actually. I wish I have the same family just like them. One day my classmates broughy us to their house, it was so huge and beautiful. She had lots of dolls and toys, which I don’t have. Somehow I felt so jealous, I was so angry why I don’t have those dolls too, but I managed not to show it to my friend. When I was about to leave my friend’s house, she said “Next time, I’ll visit your home and we will play their, ok”. I just smiled. While walking home, I had teary eyes, ‘coz I don’t have home that I could be proud of, we were only living in a small space. We were like small rats who only live in a tiny whole. When I got home, I talked to my Mom and said “Mom, can you look for a job? Is this the life that you want for us?”. I was crying that time. Months after, my mom left me and my younger brother to my grandmom. My mom went to the city and looked for a job, and she found one. She worked hard for us, she gave us everything that we need, all the things that I don’t have before. My Mom worked for 7 years in Manila, she even bought a house and little by little we were able to build our own house…our dream house. I was able to invite my friends to my home wihout even feeling insecure and shy. It was perfect. But as what they say, there are things that no matter how you plan for it, still God’s will is more powerful than any of human’s plan…until one day another big problem that changed our lives…

…to be continued.

Not feeling well today, so I have to rest for a while.